Untitled

What did I ever intend for us anyway? What did I want us to become? We were just friends, if that. We were undeveloped. We were immature. But... still I wanted something more. I craved for the next hug that was to be received. I hungered to see you smile. And yet, I know nothing about you. We're nothing more than strangers...

wow

i cant decide

i think

i think i really like you a lot, but i also think you dont know it. i do stuff i wouldnt normally do just to see you smile. well your smile is totally worth it. i just really want to let you know but im still undecided.

wtf

you dont know i exist. fml

Oh wow

School's been great, life's been good, parent's don't fight much anymore, and there are things to look forward to now. Everything is so easy right now, so nice. It's awesome haha. ^____^. I don't like any girls right now which is pretty good, considering all the drama they bring. Me and Mahina are getting close again, we talk more, we share stories, we make pinky promises, we laugh and hang out. This time I want to stay close LONGER. Not like eighth grade, we barely even talked. Basketball season is coming up so I'm going to try out. :] My physical is tomorrow though, fucking awkward LOL. Homecoming skit was a disaster haha but whatever. Life's been treating me pretty well, made new friends, got talent show coming up, PLUS got holidays very soon. haha can't wait! Don't think anyone hates me right now, so that's good. Just wanted to share.... I'm content as of now.

Girls

Man oh man are they confusing but I've been wondering, are girls really confusing or do we just make them out to be that way? Are they too needy or do we just not give them enough attention? I currently don't have feelings for anyone, if you think that's what this is about. I just want to speak on the subject of girls. Why is it that when we first meet a girl that we like everything she does is cute? The way she smiles, the way she walks, the way she talks, the way she sits, etc. And how come after a week or two when you lose feelings for her, everything she did was annoying and bugged you? Why do you regret ever taking the time to know her? And why do you lose hope of meeting someone you can be with for a long, long time? This just could be me. Maybe I change my mind to quickly or maybe I mess things up. It's like every time I watch a movie that has a couple in it or hear a love song I think, "Wow, I want that. I want that with the girl of my dreams." But that goes to show, do I like girls, or do I just like the chase? I'm too young to decide that for right now. What about when you go out with someone and you break up you think that you're done with relationships but then the next day you're already checking other girls out? Maybe I'm the only one who does this. Maybe I'm just way inexperienced with girls and relationships. Who knows? Tell me if you agree or disagree and personal experiences would be great.

FML

found out bad news.... not tragic... jut disappointing.... FML

What pisses me off is...

If you talk to me on AIM and read my blog, then you would realise that I type different. This is only to help you guys read and understand what I'm typing and what I'm trying to say. BUT! I really just hate it when people type all ghetto because they think it looks cool or sounds better or because one of their friends it doing it. And you know what really gets me? The fact that they don't even talk like that in real life. It just doesn't make sense, and it's really stupid, honestly. And another thing that pisses me off is how people try to seem badass on the internet. Not trying to pick out specific people, or anything. But if myspace, facebook, friendster is a way to meet some one, maybe a friend of a friend, then you should desscribe the real you on your profile. Not some image that you think you are, because it's cooler than who you are. That also pissed me off. Imagine meeting some one in real life after you met them on myspace. Then, they get to know you, and then they realize that you are NOT anything like who you described yourself to be. Guess what? You just told them the biggest lie, ABOUT YOURSELF. So please, if you have a myspace, facebook, friendster, xanga, porntube, etc. Just tell it like it is and don't lie to people about who you are. Chances are, the real you will be cooler.

I can't think of a color for this feeling.

Today was probably the best day of the week. I met up with Timmy, Tram, Catherine, Allison, Vy, and Bailey at Grove around 1, because they had to register. Most of them were people I was meeting for the first time. They were all pretty cool because Tim has good judgement with his friends. They were stuck in line while me and Timmy were walking around trying to fins trams locker. We got lost pretty badly. LOL. We met back up with them in line and me and Timmy went to the guys' room and from there the rest of the day was amazing. Apparently I kept offering everone gum. Kehehe. Then Bailey got through the first station so I walked with her to all the other stations. We met up with Johnny and Mia at around the 7th station. Then Vy and Tram split from us to goo hang out with other friends. Then for some reason we went to the library and waited until 4 so Catherine could go to practice. The library was fun we just went in the kids' section and talked at a table. After that we went to the gym for catherines practice, but me and Bailey went to go get fries at MacDonalds, but we came back. By the time we got back though, Johnny left. Catherine got out of practice at around 5 and we walked across the street and just sat and talked in front on the stairs. People started leaving but Don and Jaime came on their bikes and I was waiting for a ride from my dad. I got home did trash for me house and took a nap at around 7:45. I was planning on sleeping all the way through to mornin but my body didnt let me. I ended waking up around 9:30 and now I'm hungry. :P All and all, today was a fun day.

White

So I'm feeling pretty white again right now. Carefree, relaxed, just looking to have some fun. This weekend has been pretty fun so far, went out yesterday and today to go watch movies. I saw G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra yesterday and I thought it was a pretty good movie so I might watch it again if i ever get the chance. Today I watched UP for the third time and I can never get enough of this movie. Even after watching it three times, it still made my cry. I know, I know, I'm being a pussy, but I can't help it. Tomorrow I'm going to a birthday party and I need to be up by 8 to shower so that i can be ready to leave at 10. Since I'm used to sleeping in until 12 or 1, I decided I'm going to pull an all-nighter so I won't have to wake up early. Not much is on my mind right now, just looking back on 8th grade year. Wish I hung out with Traphik Kidz more. Haha. They're some cool kids. Just want high school to come already so I have something to do instead of just wasting my days at home. Grrr, I'm just going on and on and I'm not really making sense. Haha. Guess I'm done with this post.

Do You Ever?

This blog is not like the other ones where I blog about my day. It's just that earlier Manuel and I were talking on AIM and we started talking about relationships. I swear this is not gay. Haha. Anyway I just wanted to ask you guys, do you ever like the chase more than the actual person? I mean sometimes i can be crazy about a girl and sometimes I can like her just because it's getting exciting. Is this wrong? I don't know. You tell me, because I'm not really good at relationships and there are a lot of people out there with more dating experience than me. I just wanted to know if you guys ever find yourself in the situation that I'm sometimes in. Don't get me wrong, I don't only like the chase, I like the girl too. But sometimes flirting just gets exciting and you have more fun flirting than getting to know the girl. I hope I'm not being a jerk or anything. Post your answers in comments.

Teal

Yeah, my favorite color and my current mood. Feeling mellow, cool, chill? Like water? I don't know what color explains it really, but it's good enough. Today was like Monday woke up pretty late and didn't do much except watch movies with my parents and then went to piano class at around 7pm. Nothing exciting. But me and my sister go to the liquor store next door every week when we have lesson and we got to know the guy that works there. So today there were new type of chips that I wanted to try but I also wanted to get Hot Cheetos. So I was standing there for a while asking my sister which bag I should get and she kept telling me that I only have one dollar. After I paid for my Hot Cheetos the guy turned my sister and was like just take the other bag. We got hooked up, dawg. Haha. Highlight of my day. Going to Grove tomorrow to pick up my registration packet around 1pm. I'm gonna go to sleep now, so good night.

Shout out to my boo, Alison Sorn! <3

Orange

I don't know what I'm still doing up right now. Having a hard time sleeping. Damn, I'm wide awake. I'm feeling orange right now, so I guess that's like frustrated but not angry like red or something. Haha. I'm just getting frustrated with myself because I have nothing exciting to do anymore. And I'm starting to get disappointed in myself because I took such a long break from dancing. Shit. I can't even do moves that I would usually nail 100 times becuase I pussy out now. I have a really big problem with that, pussying out. I like a girl, right? She like me too, right? We should go out, right? Right. But every single time that happens I end up pussying out and it's gets really annoying after a while. Yeah, that's right. I annoy myself. I disappoint myself too. *Sigh* Wish things would really start looking up for me. I just want high school to come around so I can just really start fresh with a clean slate. Going to try going to sleep now. All I can say is alone time really gave my time to think about who cool I think I am compared to how cool I am in real life. And shit, I was way off. Haha.

White

So from now on I'm going to be posting my blog titles as colors to represent my mood. Pretty homo I know, but its the best idea I got. Today will be white, because I'm feeling pretty carefree and had a fun day. I also wore a white shirt today. Haha. See how I planned that? Just kidding. This morning i went over to Don's house, but it got way delayed because of my dad but it was all good. We played games for a little bit and then went outside for a while to go ride around. I felt pretty out of place with them because I don't skate or bike so I just sat there while they were doing tricks and stuff. I can dance though, just saying. Haha. My mom picked me up from Don's house aroung six o' clock and then we picked up my sister at Baskin 31 Robin's because she went there after tutoring. We came home and ate dinner which was pretty good because my mom cooked my favorite soup. Yummy. Then me and my dad sat and watched 24 and I feel asleep so I missed a couple episodes. We finished the newest season on dvd box set and now I'm like crap what do I do now? Haha. Don't think I'll be going to sleep anytime soon since I just woke up from my nap.

Grey

First blog ever for me and I'm pretty new at it. Haha. Didn't make much of my day today, just sat at home like usual and watched TV with my dad. Yeah, I'm pretty lame. I should really start dancing more though, I'm forgetting to add my signature moves into my freestyles. Damn. Really wish summer was over actually I can't stand the boredom anymore. It's killing me. I hope things really start to turn around in high school for me. I don't know why I'm saying this, but I think I'm going to try to give myself a makeover for high school. Haha. Hope there are cute freshman girls when i go turn in my yellow card at Grove this week. Damn, that's pretty shallow, isn't it? I always thought writing blogs was a girly thing but now I seriously hit rock bottom and need something to entertain me. That's how bored I am. Well going to go to Don's house tomorrow and play COD 5 so that'll be pretty fun for this week. Haha. I'm done for tonight.